The Rarest Kind Of Friendship

There is a friendship based on talking. It is common. Dale Carnegie says you can “win” these sort of friends. All you need to do is let them speak. So long as you nod and mumble with credible frequency you can assemble a substantial collection of these sort of friends.

This common friendship is epidermal. Surface conversations rubbing up against each other, with very little permeation. People taking turns to speak, but no one taking time to listen. You like my post, I’ll like yours and boom – we’re friends.

The rarest kind of friendship however, behaves differently. It does not wait its turn to speak. Sometimes it yields its turn and sits in silence for long periods. At other times it interrupts brusquely and speaks its mind. It does this because it is engaged, it understands, participates and even anticipates. In short it loves.

This is friendship based on active hearing! It is sacred because it sees into your soul and speaks wisdom, comfort and truth to what it sees there.

I am blessed. I have friends who occasionally touch my soul. Their words are kisses and their eyes sing my undeserved praises. They “get” me without making me explain myself. They can rebuke me or bless me but always I feel restful and improved when I have been with them. Jesus himself is one such friend, he touches my soul frequently (John 15:15).

I think I understand the goal (Prov. 17:17, 18:24, 27:6,9). I wish I did not fail so often. I pray that I might be a soul-touching friend for a few people at least some of the time as I live. And I pray that you would have such a friend and be such a friend too.

Who or what touches your soul? How do you practice deep friendship? Please leave a comment.

Posted by Allan Demond

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